Just tell us your idea and we'll vote for it

When we first saw this story about how a high-speed rail system could boost the Valley's economy, we thought it sounded familiar. We couldn't quite put our finger on it until all of the sudden it was clear as day...

(Apologies for the still photos, apparently this is the only video not on YouTube)

Time for some basic definitions

When this site was started, we were operating under the assumption that we were the only real classically-defined blog that wrote about local stuff. We didn't look around for evidence to the contrary because we live here, and we're 98% sure nobody besides us knows what the hell a blog is. Well, after doing the bi-weekly duty of checking what the Record calls blogs, Fitzy reenforces that sentiment. For about 3 or so minutes we were surprised we had never heard of SaveStockton.org, then we visited the site.

Fitzy, that's not a blog, that's a message board. We're a blog. But thanks for making us think we had some competition there for a second. But hey, congrats on being the oldest peson to not know what a hedge apple is.

A list Stockton's guaranteed to never top

Considering the name of this blog is dedicating to seeing Stockton on top of as many lists as possible, it can't be too much of a surprise that Slick and I pay a decent amount of attention to useless lists that rank cities for various things. As both of us can attest, Stockton will never ever top Forbes' list of the best cities for singles.

I hate to go off topic and breakdown an arbitrary list, so I'll just point out hilarious highlight. Sacramento should never ever, in a million years be anywhere near that list. EVER.

That concludes our off-topic discussion for the weekend.

(Insert "you fucked up" chant here)

Sorry for my absence guys. I thought I had posted the BWDW on Friday but I guess I just saved it as a draft or something. Since the bar it was about is in the past tense now the post needs to have some tinkering done to make it relevant. It'll be up Friday, unless I fuck it up again. Which is not only possible, but probable.

Slick's back in town but it's been a pretty slow local news week. The front page of the local section (and the featured story on recordnet.com?) was a story about a motivational speaker doing his thing at St. Marys. He has no arms, no legs, and what looks like a penis for a foot. (Don't worry, I'm 99% sure I'm going to hell anyways.) It's a touching story. And by touching I mean mind-crushingly useless. (Did you know you should be yourself and not sweat high school drama? Thanks Jesus freak...err guy.) I saw through this shtick when I was 14. Can't they at least have gotten Matt Rolloff?

Oh, and Fitzy wants us to buy a boat because it was built in Stockton. Which makes sense since the city's been trying so hard to keep other historical pieces of Stockton around. Oh wait. Well, at least Stockton's got the extra scratch to throw around...oh wait. (Yes, both those columns are from the same edition of the Record, only 7 freaking pages apart. But I'm stealing Slick's thunder. I just had to point that out.)

Lastly, I put the all points bulletin out on MySpace, but if you're a local band interested in getting your music played on our coming-sooner-than-you-think podcast, shoot me an e-mail.

Hasselhoff approved, KITT not so sure.

Ok, confession time. I actually wrote the quick links last night and scheduled the post for this morning. I wasn't even awake at 7. But hey, we're slowly posting more regularly. That's gotta count for something.

In hindsight I wish I had held off until I read today's Record which is a cornicopia of ads disguised as articles. The most egregious of which is the featured story on the front page. For those too lazy to click through, it's pretty much a soft feature on Stockton resident Queen Emily. She's made it to the next stage of America's Got Talent.

Now don't get me wrong, I'm all for finding the local angle in something, but it isn't exactly the most heartwarming story. First of all, she's not even really from Stockton. She moved here a fucking year ago. I'm no elitest, but as far as I'm concerned she's "Houston's Queen Emily" not Stockton's. (Trust me, Duke is worse. He still asks "old or new?" when someone says they're from Morada.)

Ignoring the fact that outside of the hip-hop world any broad who gives themself a royal nickname without actually being related to royalty is usually a royal bitch, the feature continues. She's unselfishly taken in her daughter's troubled sons. Which is actually pretty awesome until a later story tells us that when faced with the choice of having electricity or entering a singing competition, she choses to spend her power bill money to enter the singing competition.

What? Is that supposed to show drive and determination in the face of adversity or show that she shouldn't have those two sons with her?

On top of all that, they're making it seem like it's a big deal that she might win the minor league of talent based reality shows. (At least Stockton's staying consistant.) No less an authority than The Hoff himself says she's an amazing singer. The guy who brought us "Looking for Freedom" and "Du" musically and Baywatch Nights visually (It's baywatch with clothes! It'll be awesome!) is the guy we're supposed to listen to.

Look, I don't know the lady. All I'm saying is if she actually had talent, she'd be on American Idol and not some filler reality show that can only get ratings during the television wasteland that is the summer.

I'd also dissect Fitzy's press release for the new bakery that opened at the BJ's/REI shopping center. But this thing's getting to long as it is. Although I'm wondering how much I have to pay to get my own article. I can offer $5 and a handful of fun-sized Big Hunks.