Earlier today I was working on a post about Don Blount's latest offering (which will probably be up tomorrow, sorry for the slacking) about riding the late night bus and came across something curious. The column can be found here, but occasionally, links older than a day do not show up on the main news page (if at all) so I have to use the Google Advanced Search options and just enter an exceprt of the article I'm looking for. Yes, even with the improvements the Record's site is a bear to navigate. Not the animal kind, the big gay hairy dude kind.
Anyways, out of habit I did that with this column. I entered a passage from his column and Google spit back this. Now, one should note I'm using site search, so the only website that should show up should be Recordnet.com. Yet Google kicks back that site and only that site. Other stories show up fine, but Blount's continues to show up only on this TMCnews site. It appears to be a word for word reproduction, and the column is also on Recordnet.com so theoretically it should show up under the Record's site on Google, but it don't.
So does this mean Google is trying to deny the rest of the world the musings of Don Blount? I sure hope not, that would be mean. Almost as mean as not loaning out your cell phone. But, as usual with these things, it leaves us asking the age old quesiton, what the fuck Recordnet?
Showing posts with label shit don blount saw. Show all posts
Showing posts with label shit don blount saw. Show all posts
Tuesday, May 26, 2009
Monday, May 4, 2009
Quick Links for May 4th
Well, it's Monday. We miss anything good over the weekend? I guess we'll find out in today's Quick Links!
Well, it's official. Swine flu has jumped the shark
It's hard to tell when a story has reached it's peak. We thought for sure the Cantu coverage was going to die down but then some farm workers had to find a fucking suitcase and gave the story another 2 weeks of coverage. That militia story seems to have died down, although we suspect with police layoffs coming in the not too distant future that story may blow up again.
But luckily for us we have a fool proof indicator of when a story is going to finally die, and it's name is Don Blount. Don is kind of famous around these parts for being the last dying breath of any story that gains some sort of notoriety around these parts. He chimed in on Obama a week after everybody else did. He gave us his opinion on Stockton being named the most miserable town in America after pretty much everybody debunked that myth and had moved on (and then brought it up again a week later). And the last time anybody mentioned that roving gang of armed (but not legged *rimshot*) vigilantes was when Blount likened them to the Klan (and then, just for kicks, brought it up a week later. Yes, again).
That's an impressive path of destruction for a guy who's only been writing a column for 4 months. He's like the Ted McGinley of journalistic shark jumping. So it's only fitting that the day he writes about the dangers of Swine flu and what precautions to take against it is the same day major media outlets are realizing they may have overreacted just a smidge.
So for those of you already tired of the Swine flu non-demic, it's almost over. See, Don Blount's good for something.
Something about "Stockton" and "fighting" seems vaguely familiar
It's been a few months since the election cycle ended (the upcoming special election doesn't count since, as the Record pointed out, nobody's going to vote in it), but instead of letting us enjoy an extended break after what seemed like 4 straight years of campaign ads, Susan Eggman's getting her fundraise on a little early this year. Which is fine by me since she doesn't represent my district (or at least I'm pretty sure she doesn't since I don't live in the SOUTH!).
Although we have to point out that the early version of her campaign slogan does seem to echo sentiments we've been pushing since last summer, which is encouraging to say the least. Mostly because we're all for people agreeing with us. So Susan Eggman wants to fight for Stockton, let's hope this results in some sort of campaign event where her and Nick Diaz sing some sort of duet (What? You didn't know she sings at campaign events?). Preferably "Eye of the Tiger".
It's not a race thing, Morada just hates religion
I kid of course, actually it's a traffic thing. But I defer to former Morada resident El Duke for this one:
"Traffic on the Frontage Road east of 99 can get pretty bad at times, but their claim is still bullshit. The area they're considering building the mosque at over by Shippee is at the south end of Morada. The only way it'll really affect traffic is if you have to go down to Weinerschnitzel. And nobody goes to that Weinerschnitzel. Even then the traffic can be avoided by jumping on the 3 overpasses that connect Morada to the rest of Stockton and shoot on down the Frontage Road on the west of 99 to get pretty much anywhere. So really, they're just bitching about a slight inconvenience.
Really it's just that Moradans like to think they live in some sleepy rural town that is immune to growth. They're resistant to any change. They opposed the Harvest Bible Church and they didn't even have to build their building. They just occupy the old Sibbs/Mar-Val/Babe's Liquor strip mall. That's how fearful they are of change. They'd rather let a vacant strip mall sit there and rot than have something disturb their quaint little community."
Translation? Morada's like a mini-Lodi.
Well, it's official. Swine flu has jumped the shark
It's hard to tell when a story has reached it's peak. We thought for sure the Cantu coverage was going to die down but then some farm workers had to find a fucking suitcase and gave the story another 2 weeks of coverage. That militia story seems to have died down, although we suspect with police layoffs coming in the not too distant future that story may blow up again.
But luckily for us we have a fool proof indicator of when a story is going to finally die, and it's name is Don Blount. Don is kind of famous around these parts for being the last dying breath of any story that gains some sort of notoriety around these parts. He chimed in on Obama a week after everybody else did. He gave us his opinion on Stockton being named the most miserable town in America after pretty much everybody debunked that myth and had moved on (and then brought it up again a week later). And the last time anybody mentioned that roving gang of armed (but not legged *rimshot*) vigilantes was when Blount likened them to the Klan (and then, just for kicks, brought it up a week later. Yes, again).
That's an impressive path of destruction for a guy who's only been writing a column for 4 months. He's like the Ted McGinley of journalistic shark jumping. So it's only fitting that the day he writes about the dangers of Swine flu and what precautions to take against it is the same day major media outlets are realizing they may have overreacted just a smidge.
So for those of you already tired of the Swine flu non-demic, it's almost over. See, Don Blount's good for something.
Something about "Stockton" and "fighting" seems vaguely familiar
It's been a few months since the election cycle ended (the upcoming special election doesn't count since, as the Record pointed out, nobody's going to vote in it), but instead of letting us enjoy an extended break after what seemed like 4 straight years of campaign ads, Susan Eggman's getting her fundraise on a little early this year. Which is fine by me since she doesn't represent my district (or at least I'm pretty sure she doesn't since I don't live in the SOUTH!).
Although we have to point out that the early version of her campaign slogan does seem to echo sentiments we've been pushing since last summer, which is encouraging to say the least. Mostly because we're all for people agreeing with us. So Susan Eggman wants to fight for Stockton, let's hope this results in some sort of campaign event where her and Nick Diaz sing some sort of duet (What? You didn't know she sings at campaign events?). Preferably "Eye of the Tiger".
It's not a race thing, Morada just hates religion
I kid of course, actually it's a traffic thing. But I defer to former Morada resident El Duke for this one:
"Traffic on the Frontage Road east of 99 can get pretty bad at times, but their claim is still bullshit. The area they're considering building the mosque at over by Shippee is at the south end of Morada. The only way it'll really affect traffic is if you have to go down to Weinerschnitzel. And nobody goes to that Weinerschnitzel. Even then the traffic can be avoided by jumping on the 3 overpasses that connect Morada to the rest of Stockton and shoot on down the Frontage Road on the west of 99 to get pretty much anywhere. So really, they're just bitching about a slight inconvenience.
Really it's just that Moradans like to think they live in some sleepy rural town that is immune to growth. They're resistant to any change. They opposed the Harvest Bible Church and they didn't even have to build their building. They just occupy the old Sibbs/Mar-Val/Babe's Liquor strip mall. That's how fearful they are of change. They'd rather let a vacant strip mall sit there and rot than have something disturb their quaint little community."
Translation? Morada's like a mini-Lodi.
Wednesday, April 15, 2009
Here's what we missed...
Sometime we get busy around here and stories fall through the cracks. Here's a couple stories that we missed (including one from today!) in a feature I'm pretty sure we call What We Missed.
Sarcasm only works in writing when the author is good at both writing and sarcasm. Don Blount isn't good at either
Bad sarcasm aside, let's move to the most important part. Where Don Blount comes from, a group of armed dudes wearing similar clothing patrolling the seedier areas of town in their cars is called the Klan. But we're not in where Don Blount comes from. We're in where Slick Diaz comes from. And where I come from, a group of armed dudes wearing similar clothing patrolling dangerous areas in their cars are called fucking GANGS.
What's that? They can't be because they're old and white? Racist!
Situations like the one surrounding the formation of the SAM are the exact same situations gangs are formed. Community members feel abandoned by the people meant to protect them so they take the law into their own hands and protect themselves and their community. Sound familiar? That's because that's exactly what the SAM is doing. And it's also how the gangs they're so hot to combat got started too.
While we can appreciate what Blount was going for, even if the entire column was borderline unreadable, likening the SAM to the Ku Klux Klan is just short sighted for multiple reasons. The biggest one being the fact that the Klan is such a lightening rod of hate that whatever argument Blount was trying to make (no matter how valid) was lost because people see the word "Klan" and go into some sort of knee jerk defense mode. Which (surprise!) is exactly what happened.
A much much much much much much (much much much ) better choice of words would have been to liken them to gangs. Or, if Blount was really set on comparing them to another group of white people, old timey gangsters. You know, the Godfather kind. Those gangs/families also formed to protect their neglected immigrant community. Sure, they're glorified now in movies and on TV, but it's still better than conjuring up images of the KKK. Doing that's almost as bad an idea as patrolling the dangerous streets of Stockton with loaded weapons and no training.
Irony alert!
While Tara Cuslidge writing about her old journalism teacher getting an award seems somewhat conflict of interesty, it's overshadowed by the hilarity of a column preaching diversity in journalism appearing in the Record. We'd outline the Record's history in diversity but if you've been reading this site (or even just the Record for that matter) you know the Record caters to one group and one group alone, rich old white people.
Ok fine, you want an example. How about the ridiculous over-coverage of minor league hockey while a popular Latino fighter spends the weekend earning a decisive victory over one of his sport's legends and only gets two paragraphs in a sports round up?
Or how about the fact that nobody's flipping out about the Cougars actually leaving town but everybody's shitting themselves over the Thunder just being put up for sale?
Or, you know, spending 2 weeks covering that Cantu case even though there was about 2 days worth of information released? Or the Record's apparent decision that the local music scene wasn't worth it and that Ian Hill was better suited standing outside a courthouse shooting video of an uninformative press conference.
And then there's always the fact that if you're a non-athlete above 17 and under 50 the only way you're getting in the paper is sending something to myRecord, while Lori Gilbert regularly writes about old people for doing shit like waiting tables and not dying (except for that one woman who actually died).
So yeah, it's ironic that the Record is writing about diversity when it's anything but. Hilarious, ain't it?
Sarcasm only works in writing when the author is good at both writing and sarcasm. Don Blount isn't good at either
Bad sarcasm aside, let's move to the most important part. Where Don Blount comes from, a group of armed dudes wearing similar clothing patrolling the seedier areas of town in their cars is called the Klan. But we're not in where Don Blount comes from. We're in where Slick Diaz comes from. And where I come from, a group of armed dudes wearing similar clothing patrolling dangerous areas in their cars are called fucking GANGS.
What's that? They can't be because they're old and white? Racist!
Situations like the one surrounding the formation of the SAM are the exact same situations gangs are formed. Community members feel abandoned by the people meant to protect them so they take the law into their own hands and protect themselves and their community. Sound familiar? That's because that's exactly what the SAM is doing. And it's also how the gangs they're so hot to combat got started too.
While we can appreciate what Blount was going for, even if the entire column was borderline unreadable, likening the SAM to the Ku Klux Klan is just short sighted for multiple reasons. The biggest one being the fact that the Klan is such a lightening rod of hate that whatever argument Blount was trying to make (no matter how valid) was lost because people see the word "Klan" and go into some sort of knee jerk defense mode. Which (surprise!) is exactly what happened.
A much much much much much much (much much much ) better choice of words would have been to liken them to gangs. Or, if Blount was really set on comparing them to another group of white people, old timey gangsters. You know, the Godfather kind. Those gangs/families also formed to protect their neglected immigrant community. Sure, they're glorified now in movies and on TV, but it's still better than conjuring up images of the KKK. Doing that's almost as bad an idea as patrolling the dangerous streets of Stockton with loaded weapons and no training.
Irony alert!
While Tara Cuslidge writing about her old journalism teacher getting an award seems somewhat conflict of interesty, it's overshadowed by the hilarity of a column preaching diversity in journalism appearing in the Record. We'd outline the Record's history in diversity but if you've been reading this site (or even just the Record for that matter) you know the Record caters to one group and one group alone, rich old white people.
Ok fine, you want an example. How about the ridiculous over-coverage of minor league hockey while a popular Latino fighter spends the weekend earning a decisive victory over one of his sport's legends and only gets two paragraphs in a sports round up?
Or how about the fact that nobody's flipping out about the Cougars actually leaving town but everybody's shitting themselves over the Thunder just being put up for sale?
Or, you know, spending 2 weeks covering that Cantu case even though there was about 2 days worth of information released? Or the Record's apparent decision that the local music scene wasn't worth it and that Ian Hill was better suited standing outside a courthouse shooting video of an uninformative press conference.
And then there's always the fact that if you're a non-athlete above 17 and under 50 the only way you're getting in the paper is sending something to myRecord, while Lori Gilbert regularly writes about old people for doing shit like waiting tables and not dying (except for that one woman who actually died).
So yeah, it's ironic that the Record is writing about diversity when it's anything but. Hilarious, ain't it?
Monday, April 6, 2009
We don't want to repeat ourselves but....
State a motherfucking opinion in your motherfucking columns!
We harped on this as early as 2 weeks ago. And well, we'll continue to do so until somebody at the Record shows they got a pair. Let's run down the list again shall we?
Let's start with Fitzy who's Sunday column seems to be warning us that there are Mexican gangs in Stockton. Allow me this moment of faux indignant surprise...
Whoa whoa whoa ! When the fuck did this happen? Gangs from fucking Mexico? Who would have thought that a town where the majority of the population is Latino would have Latin gangs? Thank you Mike Fitzgerald for bringing this to the attention of the people of Stockton. Without this column people would probably just assume that drugs just magically appear out of thin air. I'm just floored that the Norteños and Sureños aren't some sort of club like the Elk's lodge! Those guys are gangs!? Feuding gangs!? Jesus tittyfucking Christ how are we going to combat this? Quick! Get Commissioner Gordon on the phone right away! We need to alert Batman as soon as fucking possible!
Ok, sorry if that was too sarcastic for you, but I was just flabbergasted when I read that column on Sunday. The whole point of the column as far as I can tell is "there's a Mexican drug war". Which is like saying "the economy's not doing so hot right now" or "the Kings aren't an elite team this year". Shit like that just doesn't need to be said, it's just fucking known. Hell, even my 12-year old sister knows about the gangs in Stockton. Anybody who even takes a cursory glance at McNair High knows there's gangs in Stockton. At the very least, if a column's not going to state an opinion, it needs to be informative. This column was neither. Stay tuned for Fitzy's next column entitled "The Earth is round and the Sun will rise tomorrow morning." Although to be fair Peter King thought that column was a fascinating read.
As useless and insulting as Fitzy's column was, at least he didn't pretend it was anything but informing the people of what they already knew. Editor in Chief Mike Klocke's column seems to just be a laundry of list of shit that sucks right now. Which would be fine if:
A. He didn't just do that 2 weeks ago.
B. Was right about half the items on that list. Like saying there's been an uptick in crime when the crime statistics for last year haven't been officially released yet and preliminary glimpses at crime statistics actually indicate a possible slight downturn in violent crimes. (Not to mention we already know that 2008 had the fewest homicides since the days of Disco)
And C. Actually came through with the opinion the headline teases.
For those too lazy, the headline is "There's really only one way to fix Stockton's huge problems". Which would be a fine headline if he actually presented that one way in the actual column. Is he trying to say we should be more like Tracy? Because we can't. Our problems are inherently different. Tracy's not in the middle of a budget crunch. They're not considering layoffs. They're actually increasing hours for cops to find Sandra Cantu. All shit we can't do.
Is he saying we should band together as a community like Tracy has? That's a nice idea but Ann Johnston's been preaching that for months now and that's not really going to fix the problem, it's just a coping mechanism for us. Which is fine, but everybody helping out their neighbor isn't going to make $31 million dollars magically appear. It isn't going to turn the job market around. It isn't going to make downtown profitable. It will just help us get through these tough times.
The only real solution he does offer is this:
"It's becoming more apparent that the only way out of the fiscal mess is through layoffs or contractual concessions with law enforcement (police and fire)."
So, in other words. They're pretty much fucked. Which we really already knew. And that's really only one solution to the growing list of problems facing Stockton and the World today. Even if PD and FD are forced to take concessions and/or layoffs the economy would still suck. Houses with shaggy lawns will still have For Sale signs in front of them. And city workers will definitely still be pissed off at the City Council. Thanks for offering up even the tiniest sliver of hope and then just reminding us that we're completely and totally fucked Mike. Because it's not depressing enough when those thoughts are in the back of my head, you have to go and bring them to the forefront twice in the span of a month.
And then, well, then we get to Don Blount. Don wants you to know that his credit card number got stolen. Why? Frankly I don't know. Why does Don do anything these days? It's becoming more and more apparent that we missed the mark when coming up with a name for Don's column. It's not "Shit Don Blount Saw" it's like we're reading his fucking diary.
No really, observe.
Dear Diary,
Ted Bestolairdes hasn't apologized to me yet. He's such a meany.
Love, Donny
Dear Diary,
I saw some of those old fashioned typewriters and thought about buying one but I didn't. I showed good self control. I think I deserve some Ben and Jerry's for showing such restraint. Americone Dream is just the best.
Love, Donny
Dear Diary,
Some scary dogs were fighting in my driveway. I scared them off though because I'm so big and strong. By the way, did you know Obama's black like me? It's amazing. I bet Obama could scare off stray dogs too. So in a way, President Obama and I are a lot alike. Kind of like we're related. But not brothers, that would be racist. Gotta go, taking the kids on a hike.
Love, Donny
And of course today's entry...
Dear Diary,
Somebody stole my credit card number! Sure I didn't incur any actual losses and my credit card company caught it really quick but if it could happen to me it could happen to anybody! The internet is a scary place.
Love, Donny
The best part is that last one was actually written like a letter to the identity thief. But god Lord, you're writing for a newspaper Don, not your fucking Twitter feed. Quit using the newspaper to update your family and the rest of the world about what's going on in your life. Noone cares. At least this column was somewhat informative. Even if it did miss simple things like "Make sure your anti-virus software and firewall are up-to-date" and "take precautions to prevent keyloggers". Although, to be fair, high-tech phrases like "firewall" and "keyloggers" probably go right over the heads of the average Record reader. I can just see some 70 year old shut in attempting to set the wall behind her computer on fire to prevent those evil hackers from getting those pictures of her grandson her daughter e-mailed to her that she can't figure out how to access. At least it'd give the Fire Department another reason to say "See! You guys need us!"
And that is how you state a motherfucking opinion.
We harped on this as early as 2 weeks ago. And well, we'll continue to do so until somebody at the Record shows they got a pair. Let's run down the list again shall we?
Let's start with Fitzy who's Sunday column seems to be warning us that there are Mexican gangs in Stockton. Allow me this moment of faux indignant surprise...
Whoa whoa whoa ! When the fuck did this happen? Gangs from fucking Mexico? Who would have thought that a town where the majority of the population is Latino would have Latin gangs? Thank you Mike Fitzgerald for bringing this to the attention of the people of Stockton. Without this column people would probably just assume that drugs just magically appear out of thin air. I'm just floored that the Norteños and Sureños aren't some sort of club like the Elk's lodge! Those guys are gangs!? Feuding gangs!? Jesus tittyfucking Christ how are we going to combat this? Quick! Get Commissioner Gordon on the phone right away! We need to alert Batman as soon as fucking possible!
Ok, sorry if that was too sarcastic for you, but I was just flabbergasted when I read that column on Sunday. The whole point of the column as far as I can tell is "there's a Mexican drug war". Which is like saying "the economy's not doing so hot right now" or "the Kings aren't an elite team this year". Shit like that just doesn't need to be said, it's just fucking known. Hell, even my 12-year old sister knows about the gangs in Stockton. Anybody who even takes a cursory glance at McNair High knows there's gangs in Stockton. At the very least, if a column's not going to state an opinion, it needs to be informative. This column was neither. Stay tuned for Fitzy's next column entitled "The Earth is round and the Sun will rise tomorrow morning." Although to be fair Peter King thought that column was a fascinating read.
As useless and insulting as Fitzy's column was, at least he didn't pretend it was anything but informing the people of what they already knew. Editor in Chief Mike Klocke's column seems to just be a laundry of list of shit that sucks right now. Which would be fine if:
A. He didn't just do that 2 weeks ago.
B. Was right about half the items on that list. Like saying there's been an uptick in crime when the crime statistics for last year haven't been officially released yet and preliminary glimpses at crime statistics actually indicate a possible slight downturn in violent crimes. (Not to mention we already know that 2008 had the fewest homicides since the days of Disco)
And C. Actually came through with the opinion the headline teases.
For those too lazy, the headline is "There's really only one way to fix Stockton's huge problems". Which would be a fine headline if he actually presented that one way in the actual column. Is he trying to say we should be more like Tracy? Because we can't. Our problems are inherently different. Tracy's not in the middle of a budget crunch. They're not considering layoffs. They're actually increasing hours for cops to find Sandra Cantu. All shit we can't do.
Is he saying we should band together as a community like Tracy has? That's a nice idea but Ann Johnston's been preaching that for months now and that's not really going to fix the problem, it's just a coping mechanism for us. Which is fine, but everybody helping out their neighbor isn't going to make $31 million dollars magically appear. It isn't going to turn the job market around. It isn't going to make downtown profitable. It will just help us get through these tough times.
The only real solution he does offer is this:
"It's becoming more apparent that the only way out of the fiscal mess is through layoffs or contractual concessions with law enforcement (police and fire)."
So, in other words. They're pretty much fucked. Which we really already knew. And that's really only one solution to the growing list of problems facing Stockton and the World today. Even if PD and FD are forced to take concessions and/or layoffs the economy would still suck. Houses with shaggy lawns will still have For Sale signs in front of them. And city workers will definitely still be pissed off at the City Council. Thanks for offering up even the tiniest sliver of hope and then just reminding us that we're completely and totally fucked Mike. Because it's not depressing enough when those thoughts are in the back of my head, you have to go and bring them to the forefront twice in the span of a month.
And then, well, then we get to Don Blount. Don wants you to know that his credit card number got stolen. Why? Frankly I don't know. Why does Don do anything these days? It's becoming more and more apparent that we missed the mark when coming up with a name for Don's column. It's not "Shit Don Blount Saw" it's like we're reading his fucking diary.
No really, observe.
Dear Diary,
Ted Bestolairdes hasn't apologized to me yet. He's such a meany.
Love, Donny
Dear Diary,
I saw some of those old fashioned typewriters and thought about buying one but I didn't. I showed good self control. I think I deserve some Ben and Jerry's for showing such restraint. Americone Dream is just the best.
Love, Donny
Dear Diary,
Some scary dogs were fighting in my driveway. I scared them off though because I'm so big and strong. By the way, did you know Obama's black like me? It's amazing. I bet Obama could scare off stray dogs too. So in a way, President Obama and I are a lot alike. Kind of like we're related. But not brothers, that would be racist. Gotta go, taking the kids on a hike.
Love, Donny
And of course today's entry...
Dear Diary,
Somebody stole my credit card number! Sure I didn't incur any actual losses and my credit card company caught it really quick but if it could happen to me it could happen to anybody! The internet is a scary place.
Love, Donny
The best part is that last one was actually written like a letter to the identity thief. But god Lord, you're writing for a newspaper Don, not your fucking Twitter feed. Quit using the newspaper to update your family and the rest of the world about what's going on in your life. Noone cares. At least this column was somewhat informative. Even if it did miss simple things like "Make sure your anti-virus software and firewall are up-to-date" and "take precautions to prevent keyloggers". Although, to be fair, high-tech phrases like "firewall" and "keyloggers" probably go right over the heads of the average Record reader. I can just see some 70 year old shut in attempting to set the wall behind her computer on fire to prevent those evil hackers from getting those pictures of her grandson her daughter e-mailed to her that she can't figure out how to access. At least it'd give the Fire Department another reason to say "See! You guys need us!"
And that is how you state a motherfucking opinion.
Monday, March 30, 2009
Let he who has never done anything stupid cast the first squirrell
"Who are you?" "The spirit of Cesar Chavez." "Why do you look like Cesar Romero?" "Because you don't know what Cesar Chavez looks like." The Simpsons Season 12 Ep. 15Well, apparently my advice from last week was taken and Don Blount formed an opinion on something. Predictably it was a horribly wrong opinion. I said it Thursday and I'll say it again, people are allowed to be ignorant. Why else would half the people in newspapers still be around?
We touched on this last week. But since Don saw it and decided to push it into this week's news cycle, we'll go a little bit more in depth.
First of all, was what he said really that bad? We're of course taking him at his word that there was no malice meant in what he said. What did he say? That he thought Chavez was a Communist organizer. Is calling somebody a Commie even really an insult anymore? Barack Obama gets called socialist on what seems like an hourly basis on Fox News. That's a legitimate (well, as legit as Fox gets) news organization that's broadcast nationwide. Bestolairdes' transgression was sent in a private e-mail that was leaked to the press. But I'm getting ahead of myself.
The point is, that calling someone a communist is a fucking joke. Nobody outside of the 1950s uses that as a serious accusation. Anybody who takes it as an actual insult is a fucking pussy. It even states in the column that Chavez found it entertaining to combat allegations of communism. It's an absurd accusation. Joe McCarthy thinks it's laughable in this day and age.
I'm actually glad Don Blount brought up Barack Obama's "Special Olympics" remark on Leno as another example of an insensitive misstep because anybody who was offended by that is also a fucking pussy. If you had listened to the context of that joke you'd know Obama was right. Leno was in the midst of blowing him over his decidedly average bowling score and Barry correctly told him to cut that shit out. Why the fuck was that even a news item? Well, that brings me to my next point.
News organizations get e-mails from special interest groups all the time. It's really fucking annoying. And unfortunately, Bestolairdes' e-mail was sent directly to a special interest group. They saw an opportunity to push their agenda right before Cesar Chavez Day and sent the e-mail to the Record. The Record pounced on the opportunity because, as we
And that's truly the sad part of this whole thing, in the interest of self-promotion and space filling, intent was thrown out the window. Did Bestolairdes intend to offend Stockton's sizeable Latino population? Of course not. He made an ignorant statement in a private e-mail. If anything, the Dolores Huerta Foundation should be apologizing to Bestolairdes for publicly disseminating his e-mail. He apologized to the involved parties.
If he had accidently hit "reply all" and sent that e-mail out to every city computer or something, then yes, a public apology would be warranted. But he didn't publicize his ignorance, the special interest groups did. All to pretty blatantly promote their agenda. Because, let's face it, Steve Bestolairdes knows who Cesar Chavez was. He's not retarded. He was just a tired man who made a bad joke. Funny thing is, the joke wasn't even about Cesar Chavez. As far as we can tell, dude was making a joke about Barack Obama. A guy who's opponents referred to him as a community organizer in a negative fashion. And a guy who, as we said earlier, is called a communist on a pretty regular basis. He was comparing the bullshit Chavez faced with the bullshit Obama faces today. So, if anything, Bestolairdes was guilty of making a bad joke after a 16-hour day. Which A) is exactly what he apologized for, and B) is something every single fucking one of us has done before.
But let's assume for a second that he didn't know who Chavez was before getting politically gangraped by the Latino special interest groups. Is it really that big of a fucking deal? Isn't that why we have a Cesar Chavez Day? To educate those who don't know as to who the man was? In the article Jennie Rodriguez wrote about the Cesar Chavez Day festivities (which appears on the page opposite Blount's column) one of the people she interviews is a Mexican immigrant named Enrique Jimenez who admits that he doesn't know much about Chavez himself. I don't see Pedro Ramirez running to hand him a pamphlet. And that brings me to my last point.
The only reason this is even an issue, and the reason Blount argues a more public apology is necessary, is because Bestolairdes holds a public office. And everybody's all too willing to jump on public officials because they "should know better." Well guess what? That's bullshit. The beauty of our political system is that any Joe Schmoe can hold a public office. But nobody wants to because for some God forsaken reason people think that if you can get a majority of the people to like you enough to vote for you, you must be smarter than they are. Well, they're not. Just look at the past couple Delta trustee boards. They're people just like you and me. And, I hate to be the one to break this to you, people fuck up all the time.
Especially at this low of a level of public office. I can at least understand some of the outrage directed at Obama for his comment on Leno because he's the fucking President and said it on a nationally televised program. Bestolairdes is a school district trustee. And in one of the smaller school districts at that. Fuck, if I had the money, a death wish, and lived in the proper area I could be a Lincoln Unified Trustee. Yet, Don Blount is comparing him to Barack Obama and nobody seems to have a problem with this? How is that an apt comparison?
Of course, none of this is new. As a society we've been overscrutinizing our public figures for years with no regard for the impact it might have. To see the impact one just needs to look at the postgame press conference of almost every sporting event. You get homogenized quotes like "Both teams played hard" and "I'd like to thank God and my teammates". It's fucking boring.
But guys like Bob Knight or Ron Artest, who are just genuinely being themselves, are vilified for being too honest with their emotions. Ron Artest is labeled as crazy for, in the heat of the moment, running into the stands after somebody threw a beer at him. In hindsight everybody was eager to say "How could he do such a thing with so much money and fame at stake?" When, in reality, if somebody throws a beer at me I'm not thinking "What are the financial ramapercussions of my actions?" I'm thinking "Where's the motherfucker who threw that fucking beer at me? I'm going to beat the fuck out of him." If you think that's an incorrect line of thinking let me know where you're drinking this weekend and I'll huck a Coors Light at you and we'll see what you think then.
I guess what I'm trying to get at in an entirely roundabout way is that we're all too eager to judge others while ignoring our own shortcomings. Everybody fucks up, it's just a matter of to what degree. Bestolairdes fucked up to a microscopic degree and for some reason it's being treated as if he called Chavez the brown Hitler. All to promote some bullshit event.
Was it really worth it? I guess we'll find out the next time somebody tries to pry some actual important information from an elected official. Will they speak somewhat freely (well, as freely as a politician can speak) and let that nugget of information slip? Or will they remember how their pal got destroyed in the press over a tiny misstep and clam up? Think about that the next time you see a "no comment" in a story. That's real journalism at work. Intent be damned, there's pages to be filled.
Monday, March 23, 2009
I'd hate agreeing with Fitzy if he wasn't so right (this time)...and wasn't the only columnist giving us something to agree with
One of the many problems we have with the Record is the fact that their columnists suck. All of them. Fitzy writes too much about his pet projects like downtown and our "dying urban forest". Lori Gilbert writes too much about old people. Bob Highfill can't stick to one subject. Don Blount appears to be writing a stream of consciousness column, only that consciousness isn't worth writing about. And Mike Klocke usually reserves his weekly Sunday space to announce cutbacks and layoffs. Regular readers probably already know this, but this weekend provided a clear example of why they suck. They're all pussies who can't seem to actually state an opinion.
Just look at Mike Klocke's column from yesterday. All it pretty much states is that the City Council has a full plate and that their job isn't/won't be easy. Really? I thought navigating the city through a financial/housing market collapse we're largely considered the epicenter for would be a fucking cakewalk. Or negotiating with the local PD, they wouldn't cut the last council any slack and that mayor was an ex-police chief. I thought throwing a bunch of newbs at them would totally make the process go smoother. I would say this column was 100% uninformative, but it did bring to light the hilarious revelation that lesbian City Council member Susan Eggman chose to dress up, of all Harry Potter characters, notorious gay wizard Dumbledore at the Triva Bee/dress up thingy they had a few weeks ago. Although I could be wrong, maybe another character was the gay one. I don't read kids books.
Of course, if you want 100% uninformative, then Don Blount has got you covered. In this week's Shit Don Blount Saw, Don checks out those antiques he blogged about last week. Yes, Don Blount shit out an entire column about roaming what amounts to a higher end flea market. Yeah, it's riveting stuff. Did Don buy the typewriters? (Spoiler: No) Will the antiques come back next month? (Spoiler: Yes) Will anybody show up? (Spoiler: Judging by the pictures, no) Is any of this newsworthy? (Is Don's column ever newsworthy?) And most importantly, will Don buy the typewriters next time!? (Spoiler: Who the fuck cares?) Yes, as usual, Blount's column was a poorly written "Day in the Life" piece. This time about old things and replicas of old things. Lori Gilbert is insanely jealous. My favorite part of this column was the end where people are surprised the city hasn't fucked this event up yet. God I love Stockton. Except for when they fuck up so badly they make me do shit like this.
Mike Fitzgerald's column yesterday was the only column with some fucking balls. The city fucked up the downtown St. Patrick's Day party so much that Fitz actually stated a correct opinion regarding downtown's mismanagement. I'd be surprised, but it was about St. Patrick's Day and his last name is Fitzgerald. He kind of had to get it right lest his family disown him. I'm not entirely sure why he waited a week to blast the event, but at least he did so, because what the Alliance did was unforgivable. They tried to turn St. Patty's Day into a family event.
God damn that's so Stockton I don't even know where to start (Well, you know, besides when we started here). The downsizing of the event was understandable in today's economy, but the rest of Saturday's shenanigans weren't. Charging $5 for the privilege to buy a $5 was just fucking ridiculous. Especially because the event consisted of mediocre local bands playing outside the pay-area in Janet Leigh Plaza (something you can see for free on pretty much a weekly basis), and because the pay-area consisted of a couple of tents, a bunch of folding chairs and tables, a canopy, and a barbecue. All shit I could probably ask my local church for and get for free. They pulled a classic Stockton money grab and tried to squeeze every cent they could out of the increasingly destitute citizens of Stockton.
And all of that's before you get to the fact that they tried to make it a family friendly event. Which is why we're glad Fitzy said something, because a holiday based on the mass consumption of alcohol isn't exactly the best place for kids. Most people drink to get away from their kids! The other half drink because they're depressed about the economy, so thanks for fucking both halves Stockton. At least we know how badly downtown has to fuck up to get Fitzy to disagree with them. It's completely. But hey, at least he actually stated an opinion. For that, we take back 10% of what we said in this post.
Just look at Mike Klocke's column from yesterday. All it pretty much states is that the City Council has a full plate and that their job isn't/won't be easy. Really? I thought navigating the city through a financial/housing market collapse we're largely considered the epicenter for would be a fucking cakewalk. Or negotiating with the local PD, they wouldn't cut the last council any slack and that mayor was an ex-police chief. I thought throwing a bunch of newbs at them would totally make the process go smoother. I would say this column was 100% uninformative, but it did bring to light the hilarious revelation that lesbian City Council member Susan Eggman chose to dress up, of all Harry Potter characters, notorious gay wizard Dumbledore at the Triva Bee/dress up thingy they had a few weeks ago. Although I could be wrong, maybe another character was the gay one. I don't read kids books.
Of course, if you want 100% uninformative, then Don Blount has got you covered. In this week's Shit Don Blount Saw, Don checks out those antiques he blogged about last week. Yes, Don Blount shit out an entire column about roaming what amounts to a higher end flea market. Yeah, it's riveting stuff. Did Don buy the typewriters? (Spoiler: No) Will the antiques come back next month? (Spoiler: Yes) Will anybody show up? (Spoiler: Judging by the pictures, no) Is any of this newsworthy? (Is Don's column ever newsworthy?) And most importantly, will Don buy the typewriters next time!? (Spoiler: Who the fuck cares?) Yes, as usual, Blount's column was a poorly written "Day in the Life" piece. This time about old things and replicas of old things. Lori Gilbert is insanely jealous. My favorite part of this column was the end where people are surprised the city hasn't fucked this event up yet. God I love Stockton. Except for when they fuck up so badly they make me do shit like this.
Mike Fitzgerald's column yesterday was the only column with some fucking balls. The city fucked up the downtown St. Patrick's Day party so much that Fitz actually stated a correct opinion regarding downtown's mismanagement. I'd be surprised, but it was about St. Patrick's Day and his last name is Fitzgerald. He kind of had to get it right lest his family disown him. I'm not entirely sure why he waited a week to blast the event, but at least he did so, because what the Alliance did was unforgivable. They tried to turn St. Patty's Day into a family event.
God damn that's so Stockton I don't even know where to start (Well, you know, besides when we started here). The downsizing of the event was understandable in today's economy, but the rest of Saturday's shenanigans weren't. Charging $5 for the privilege to buy a $5 was just fucking ridiculous. Especially because the event consisted of mediocre local bands playing outside the pay-area in Janet Leigh Plaza (something you can see for free on pretty much a weekly basis), and because the pay-area consisted of a couple of tents, a bunch of folding chairs and tables, a canopy, and a barbecue. All shit I could probably ask my local church for and get for free. They pulled a classic Stockton money grab and tried to squeeze every cent they could out of the increasingly destitute citizens of Stockton.
And all of that's before you get to the fact that they tried to make it a family friendly event. Which is why we're glad Fitzy said something, because a holiday based on the mass consumption of alcohol isn't exactly the best place for kids. Most people drink to get away from their kids! The other half drink because they're depressed about the economy, so thanks for fucking both halves Stockton. At least we know how badly downtown has to fuck up to get Fitzy to disagree with them. It's completely. But hey, at least he actually stated an opinion. For that, we take back 10% of what we said in this post.
Monday, March 9, 2009
Quick Links for March 9th
Fuck, Monday already? Damn you Father Time! I want that hour back! At the very least Starbucks should be passing our free coffee. They do it on election day when it's borderline illegal, but not on "Lose an hour of sleep" day. It's bullshit. Anyway, we're slowly making some more changes to the site. Nothing big, just small cosmetic changes and adding some links. Oh hey, that reminds me, Quick Links!
Don Blount sees many things
A while back we said that we're pretty sure Don Blount's columns were about whatever he was thinking about during his designated "column time". And he pretty much confirms that with his first sentence today. We were scared for a second that these "unrelated thoughts" would be actual thoughts and not shit he saw, thus bucking the hilarious trend, but luckily he didn't disappoint. So much so that it's getting the mini-FJM treatment.
"I've garnered a reputation as a lover of the arts..."
When I think of Don Blount I think of theater and opera so yeah, I'd say he loves the arts.
"although I don't think anyone would confuse me with being cultured."
With writing ability like this? Really? Amazing.
"The Record tries to cover the arts community as best we can, particularly areas that we may not have given coverage to in the past."
Mostly because there's less space to do so. And less people to cover it with. Oh, and hasn't the Record always covered what it currently covers (old people and plays)? The only coverage that's really changed in the arts community is less coverage of the local music scene. Which makes total sense since by most accounts it was just starting to get big. (Well, big-ish)
"Surprisingly, my daughter loved the "Nutcracker" when she was 4."
So your kid loved a play for kids about the biggest kid holiday there is. Imagine fucking that.
"I must say that I spend just as much time during these shows watching my kids as I do the show itself."
See, that whole writing about shit he sees thing isn't a joke. And we can't stress enough how important the word "my" is to that sentence. If it's not there, this column would take a dark, dark turn.
"We've entered the realm of live chats on recordnet.com."
And just 5 years after most other websites too!
"We plan to do more of these chats, including one on Tuesday, leading up to conference play among NCAA basketball teams."
Now if only they had anybody on staff who knew about sports.
"Sports Editor Bob Highfill and Pacific beat writer Jagdip Dhillon will be online for those tournaments, particularly the Big West Conference tournament in which University of the Pacific will play."
Oh, so this chat will last for all 2 games UOP will last in the tournament. Highfill should love this since chats are essentially multiple bulletpoints.
"In journalism, we try to avoid conflicts of interest or promoting our personal projects."
Sure. Whatever you say.
Alright, this is getting too easy. Time to move on.
This council couldn't have worse timing if it tried
We don't really think this is a big deal, it's just a matter of timing. Granted, I haven't seen a video phone outside of a 90s movie's view of the future in forever, and they could probably accomplish the same thing with a computer and a web cam for a lot cheaper, but anything that could result in Arnold Schwarzenegger popping up on a video phone Total Recall-style is OK with me.
On a side note, am I the only one losing more faith in Dale Fritchen with every word that comes out of his mouth?
Save my program!
No really! Save it! Why won't anyone think of the children!? MY program is totally more important than everybody elses! Is it wrong that we're already totally jaded by these stories since it's the millionth one we've seen? If you want your program to be saved, shouldn't you be e-mailing people with money, not the newspaper? Newspapers don't have any money.
No really, newspapers don't have any money
And the best way to remedy that? Restructure ad rates to make them more affordable to businesses that are also struggling? No way! That involves complicated math! And that's not exactly a journalists strongest subject. It's wayyy easier to just lay people off then wait for that sweet sweet stimulus money to trickle down to them. Oh, and let's raise ad rates so less struggling businesses can afford them. Like we said, math is not a strong subject for newspapers. At least we know that the Record isn't going internet-only anytime soon. There's no way their website is ready for that. Of course, I'm using common sense. So look for an internet only LENS section any day now.
Don Blount sees many things
A while back we said that we're pretty sure Don Blount's columns were about whatever he was thinking about during his designated "column time". And he pretty much confirms that with his first sentence today. We were scared for a second that these "unrelated thoughts" would be actual thoughts and not shit he saw, thus bucking the hilarious trend, but luckily he didn't disappoint. So much so that it's getting the mini-FJM treatment.
"I've garnered a reputation as a lover of the arts..."
When I think of Don Blount I think of theater and opera so yeah, I'd say he loves the arts.
"although I don't think anyone would confuse me with being cultured."
With writing ability like this? Really? Amazing.
"The Record tries to cover the arts community as best we can, particularly areas that we may not have given coverage to in the past."
Mostly because there's less space to do so. And less people to cover it with. Oh, and hasn't the Record always covered what it currently covers (old people and plays)? The only coverage that's really changed in the arts community is less coverage of the local music scene. Which makes total sense since by most accounts it was just starting to get big. (Well, big-ish)
"Surprisingly, my daughter loved the "Nutcracker" when she was 4."
So your kid loved a play for kids about the biggest kid holiday there is. Imagine fucking that.
"I must say that I spend just as much time during these shows watching my kids as I do the show itself."
See, that whole writing about shit he sees thing isn't a joke. And we can't stress enough how important the word "my" is to that sentence. If it's not there, this column would take a dark, dark turn.
"We've entered the realm of live chats on recordnet.com."
And just 5 years after most other websites too!
"We plan to do more of these chats, including one on Tuesday, leading up to conference play among NCAA basketball teams."
Now if only they had anybody on staff who knew about sports.
"Sports Editor Bob Highfill and Pacific beat writer Jagdip Dhillon will be online for those tournaments, particularly the Big West Conference tournament in which University of the Pacific will play."
Oh, so this chat will last for all 2 games UOP will last in the tournament. Highfill should love this since chats are essentially multiple bulletpoints.
"In journalism, we try to avoid conflicts of interest or promoting our personal projects."
Sure. Whatever you say.
Alright, this is getting too easy. Time to move on.
This council couldn't have worse timing if it tried
We don't really think this is a big deal, it's just a matter of timing. Granted, I haven't seen a video phone outside of a 90s movie's view of the future in forever, and they could probably accomplish the same thing with a computer and a web cam for a lot cheaper, but anything that could result in Arnold Schwarzenegger popping up on a video phone Total Recall-style is OK with me.
On a side note, am I the only one losing more faith in Dale Fritchen with every word that comes out of his mouth?
Save my program!
No really! Save it! Why won't anyone think of the children!? MY program is totally more important than everybody elses! Is it wrong that we're already totally jaded by these stories since it's the millionth one we've seen? If you want your program to be saved, shouldn't you be e-mailing people with money, not the newspaper? Newspapers don't have any money.
No really, newspapers don't have any money
And the best way to remedy that? Restructure ad rates to make them more affordable to businesses that are also struggling? No way! That involves complicated math! And that's not exactly a journalists strongest subject. It's wayyy easier to just lay people off then wait for that sweet sweet stimulus money to trickle down to them. Oh, and let's raise ad rates so less struggling businesses can afford them. Like we said, math is not a strong subject for newspapers. At least we know that the Record isn't going internet-only anytime soon. There's no way their website is ready for that. Of course, I'm using common sense. So look for an internet only LENS section any day now.
Monday, February 23, 2009
Quick Links for Feb. 23rd. (aka, the part where I apoligize for the 50th time for cutting out early last week)
Hey, sorry we kind of crapped out at the end of the week. I was admittedly fairly burnt out by Thursday and that was before I had to spend the weekend moving (thanks to El Duke and Bris for helping by the way). So I could probably use a weekend from my weekend, but I'll power through because shit's been going on and we haven't covered it. I'm working on finding more writers to help lighten my writing load, I've put some feelers out to some people and as always you can e-mail us if you feel like contributing. Now let's work on some backed up Quick Links.
It's official, nobody but Forbes thinks Stockton is miserable
All together now, Don Blount saw reader responses! I'm conflicted on this one. On one hand, I'm so God damn tired of hearing about this obviously flawed Forbes list. We get it, rankings of subjective things such as misery levels aren't ironclad. But on the other hand, I don't have to read that much of Don Blount's poor excuse for prose. Which was a nice bonus.
Not that the reader reaction is any better. One guy wonders how Stockton can be both #1 in misery and an All-American City (hint: it's because AAC is also a flawed award, and we last won it 5 years ago). That same guy also says our "nice churches" are another reason we can't be miserable (What? No opera and theatre?). Ignoring the fact that some of the most miserable times I've had have been in church, the Christian Life Center on West Lane would like to disagree with that "nice" claim. Also, shouldn't scoutmasters like camping? Using it as an example of true misery seems to be counterproductive to the job description.
But anyways, for a paper that's had two people pretty much call the Forbes list an abomination to journalism, they really won't just let this story die.
Oh no! Not the Encore section! Wait, what the fuck is the Encore section?
The Coozer made an appearance in Sunday's Record to announce that the Record will ax the TV Guide section that appears in Sunday's paper in yet another cost-cutting measure. If that section was anything resembling useful we'd probably have a stronger opinion on this. But considering it was wire shit with barely comprehensible TV listings thrown in the middle it's kind of surprising this didn't happen sooner.
Although, we gotta say, if shit's so tight economically for the Record, why are they doing random special inserts like the "Outlook" special section from a week ago? It was pretty much saying "Stockton's future is going to be OK, don't kill yourself! See, not miserable." And then there's the infamous 130-page Cleveland School shooting special section from last month. It's like as soon as the Record decided to contract they decided every Sunday should be a special commemorative Sunday. We await their "Gas prices craziness!" 3-part series revisit. And somebody please tell us why the even more useless Parade magazine survived this cut.
Best way to get paid in Stockton? Stop working
Wow, this list was just unfortunate. This hasn't exactly been the best month for the city timing-wise. This list couldn't have come at a worse time as Gordon Palmer (#5!) works on negotiating paycuts to avoid police layoffs. Especially since the Fire Department accounts for 40% of the list.
But the most damaging one has to be #3, man of a million ideas Steve Pinkerton. He left the city halfway through the year! A guy who punched 6-7 months on the clock in 2008 still earned the 3rd highest civic paycheck. When reached for comment Pinkerton advised that we "revitalize our downtown." We're pretty sure he was coming on to us.
Not a good week for the homeless, and that's not a foreclosure joke
While the country works to prevent more people from losing their home, the state was figuratively buttfucking those who are currently homeless. First Cal-Trans broke up the homeless encampment under the crosstown freeway downtown, making the homeless somehow even homelesser. And then, if that weren't enough, they increased the number of homeless sex offenders by changing housing assistance limits. So not only do assloads of bums have to find new park benches to nap on, but another pederast hobo might come by and fondle their junk. What's a pederast you ask? Shut the fuck up Donnie.
Saving the best and most important for last
I first heard the news about the closing of the Miracle Mile See's Candies from Fitzy's blog. In it he talks about his fight to help save the store from closure in the 90s using his column as a jumping off platform. It serves as a fond reminder to the halcyon days when newspapers mattered.
Now? See's doesn't give a fuck, losing money is losing money and a standalone store on the Miracle Mile doesn't come cheap. Of course, since this is the Mile, all the Record's old white readers are flipping cookies. You mean, they'll have to go to *gasp!* the mall to go get expensive ass chocolate? But there's black people there! And Mexicans! You really expect them to drive a whole mile and a half down to Weberstown Mall to shop amongst common minorities!? At least make them something exotic, like Tiger Woods' kid or something.
In case you couldn't tell, we don't see what the big fucking deal is. The ambiance of the Miracle Mile died when the Stockton Royal did. And if that didn't do it, turning an awesome place like Bull-n-Bear into the douchetastic Back Bay certainly did. Nobody's even getting laid off, they just have to add 5 minutes to their commute. Stockton didn't need three See's Candies, and cutting the one that probably had the highest overhead made the most sense financially. Mileheads need to get over themselves and realize that it's OK to patronize places that aren't on the Mile or in Lincoln Center. You probably won't get shot, honest.
It's official, nobody but Forbes thinks Stockton is miserable
All together now, Don Blount saw reader responses! I'm conflicted on this one. On one hand, I'm so God damn tired of hearing about this obviously flawed Forbes list. We get it, rankings of subjective things such as misery levels aren't ironclad. But on the other hand, I don't have to read that much of Don Blount's poor excuse for prose. Which was a nice bonus.
Not that the reader reaction is any better. One guy wonders how Stockton can be both #1 in misery and an All-American City (hint: it's because AAC is also a flawed award, and we last won it 5 years ago). That same guy also says our "nice churches" are another reason we can't be miserable (What? No opera and theatre?). Ignoring the fact that some of the most miserable times I've had have been in church, the Christian Life Center on West Lane would like to disagree with that "nice" claim. Also, shouldn't scoutmasters like camping? Using it as an example of true misery seems to be counterproductive to the job description.
But anyways, for a paper that's had two people pretty much call the Forbes list an abomination to journalism, they really won't just let this story die.
Oh no! Not the Encore section! Wait, what the fuck is the Encore section?
The Coozer made an appearance in Sunday's Record to announce that the Record will ax the TV Guide section that appears in Sunday's paper in yet another cost-cutting measure. If that section was anything resembling useful we'd probably have a stronger opinion on this. But considering it was wire shit with barely comprehensible TV listings thrown in the middle it's kind of surprising this didn't happen sooner.
Although, we gotta say, if shit's so tight economically for the Record, why are they doing random special inserts like the "Outlook" special section from a week ago? It was pretty much saying "Stockton's future is going to be OK, don't kill yourself! See, not miserable." And then there's the infamous 130-page Cleveland School shooting special section from last month. It's like as soon as the Record decided to contract they decided every Sunday should be a special commemorative Sunday. We await their "Gas prices craziness!" 3-part series revisit. And somebody please tell us why the even more useless Parade magazine survived this cut.
Best way to get paid in Stockton? Stop working
Wow, this list was just unfortunate. This hasn't exactly been the best month for the city timing-wise. This list couldn't have come at a worse time as Gordon Palmer (#5!) works on negotiating paycuts to avoid police layoffs. Especially since the Fire Department accounts for 40% of the list.
But the most damaging one has to be #3, man of a million ideas Steve Pinkerton. He left the city halfway through the year! A guy who punched 6-7 months on the clock in 2008 still earned the 3rd highest civic paycheck. When reached for comment Pinkerton advised that we "revitalize our downtown." We're pretty sure he was coming on to us.
Not a good week for the homeless, and that's not a foreclosure joke
While the country works to prevent more people from losing their home, the state was figuratively buttfucking those who are currently homeless. First Cal-Trans broke up the homeless encampment under the crosstown freeway downtown, making the homeless somehow even homelesser. And then, if that weren't enough, they increased the number of homeless sex offenders by changing housing assistance limits. So not only do assloads of bums have to find new park benches to nap on, but another pederast hobo might come by and fondle their junk. What's a pederast you ask? Shut the fuck up Donnie.
Saving the best and most important for last
I first heard the news about the closing of the Miracle Mile See's Candies from Fitzy's blog. In it he talks about his fight to help save the store from closure in the 90s using his column as a jumping off platform. It serves as a fond reminder to the halcyon days when newspapers mattered.
Now? See's doesn't give a fuck, losing money is losing money and a standalone store on the Miracle Mile doesn't come cheap. Of course, since this is the Mile, all the Record's old white readers are flipping cookies. You mean, they'll have to go to *gasp!* the mall to go get expensive ass chocolate? But there's black people there! And Mexicans! You really expect them to drive a whole mile and a half down to Weberstown Mall to shop amongst common minorities!? At least make them something exotic, like Tiger Woods' kid or something.
In case you couldn't tell, we don't see what the big fucking deal is. The ambiance of the Miracle Mile died when the Stockton Royal did. And if that didn't do it, turning an awesome place like Bull-n-Bear into the douchetastic Back Bay certainly did. Nobody's even getting laid off, they just have to add 5 minutes to their commute. Stockton didn't need three See's Candies, and cutting the one that probably had the highest overhead made the most sense financially. Mileheads need to get over themselves and realize that it's OK to patronize places that aren't on the Mile or in Lincoln Center. You probably won't get shot, honest.
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
Quick Links for Feb 17th (and hopefully the last time we'll have to mention Forbes and their stupid list)
(Insert questionably witty banter here)
QUICK LINKS!
Does anybody really think Stockton is miserable?
Let's face it, if the guy who's job it is to report on crime in Stockton doesn't think the city is miserable, then Stockton's not miserable. We made the argument that Forbes' miserable city list was flawed last week, but Christian Burkin does it a lot better than us (and without cussing!).
Plus he points out something we've been harping on for months. Stockton's too focused on becoming something it's not. We're never going to be that ideal city because the ideal flat out doesn't exist. If our slogan or whatever is "Celebrate Stockton!" then fucking celebrate Stockton. Unfortunately before rolling out that campaign the city neglected to find out what they're celebrating. Are we celebrating Stockton or Fat City? Contrary to popular belief the two aren't one in the same. And until we figure that out the taxpayers are just giving city leaders an unbearably long Dutch rudder. And that's the truly miserable part of Stockton
Don Blount saw that Forbes list too!
Just when that stupid list was leaving the news cycle, Don Blount saw it and decided to give it some more life. Even though pretty much everybody's calling the list bullshit, Don has to run in at the last second and yell "Yeah! Bullshit! Me too guys!" And he does so in typically horrible fashion. At one point he actually says "Central Valley represent!" This is the editor of a newspaper mind you. Not, you know, us.
But if that wasn't embarrassing enough he also wonders out loud with Larry Ruhstaller as to why Stockton didn't get credit for having the Thunder, Cougars, Lightening, and Ports. Pro sports is part of the criteria. Let me say that again pro sports. We have the minor leagues. You may notice a difference in quality between the teams on TV and the teams in Stockton.
I could actually spend a while dissecting Blount's latest offering, but we're weary of giving this stupid Forbes list any more press than it already has. Let us know when a bullet-proof accurate list comes out, like the best beer cities.
It's a good thing they use the AP so much or else we wouldn't get such quality analysis on the Thunder (tickets still available!)
One of our main issues with the Record's sports pages, besides their apparent inability to use Google, is their overwhelming dependance on wire stories. They use wire stories for all the local pro teams (aka the important teams) and concentrate all their efforts on high school (Well, St. Mary's and Lincoln) and the local minor league teams (aka who the fuck cares). The only time you can really twist their arm to write about shit that matters is when a local kid makes one of the pro teams. You may remember Must B. Highfill's blatant fellating of St. Mary's product, Taco King, and Tampa BayDevil Ray Jason Bartlett from last year, God knows we do. Which is why we're surprised that they settled for an AP article on Stagg graduate Dallas Braden. Granted, we're not totally surprised. As the Record's outsourcing of high school games to other local papers have shown, if it's not about St. Mary's or Lincoln, they don't give a shit. If somebody else can write it, then they'll let them write it. The Record's too busy trying to force us to care about the minor league teams. In other words, much like the city, they're in a futile struggle that can't be won.
The only way we as a city are going to care about the local teams is if they win. Something only the Ports have done so far. You remember how much support they got? Yeah, it wasn't much. And they're the most popular local team. The ceiling for these teams isn't high, so hey, maybe we can spread the coverage out a little bit.
QUICK LINKS!
Does anybody really think Stockton is miserable?
Let's face it, if the guy who's job it is to report on crime in Stockton doesn't think the city is miserable, then Stockton's not miserable. We made the argument that Forbes' miserable city list was flawed last week, but Christian Burkin does it a lot better than us (and without cussing!).
Plus he points out something we've been harping on for months. Stockton's too focused on becoming something it's not. We're never going to be that ideal city because the ideal flat out doesn't exist. If our slogan or whatever is "Celebrate Stockton!" then fucking celebrate Stockton. Unfortunately before rolling out that campaign the city neglected to find out what they're celebrating. Are we celebrating Stockton or Fat City? Contrary to popular belief the two aren't one in the same. And until we figure that out the taxpayers are just giving city leaders an unbearably long Dutch rudder. And that's the truly miserable part of Stockton
Don Blount saw that Forbes list too!
Just when that stupid list was leaving the news cycle, Don Blount saw it and decided to give it some more life. Even though pretty much everybody's calling the list bullshit, Don has to run in at the last second and yell "Yeah! Bullshit! Me too guys!" And he does so in typically horrible fashion. At one point he actually says "Central Valley represent!" This is the editor of a newspaper mind you. Not, you know, us.
But if that wasn't embarrassing enough he also wonders out loud with Larry Ruhstaller as to why Stockton didn't get credit for having the Thunder, Cougars, Lightening, and Ports. Pro sports is part of the criteria. Let me say that again pro sports. We have the minor leagues. You may notice a difference in quality between the teams on TV and the teams in Stockton.
I could actually spend a while dissecting Blount's latest offering, but we're weary of giving this stupid Forbes list any more press than it already has. Let us know when a bullet-proof accurate list comes out, like the best beer cities.
It's a good thing they use the AP so much or else we wouldn't get such quality analysis on the Thunder (tickets still available!)
One of our main issues with the Record's sports pages, besides their apparent inability to use Google, is their overwhelming dependance on wire stories. They use wire stories for all the local pro teams (aka the important teams) and concentrate all their efforts on high school (Well, St. Mary's and Lincoln) and the local minor league teams (aka who the fuck cares). The only time you can really twist their arm to write about shit that matters is when a local kid makes one of the pro teams. You may remember Must B. Highfill's blatant fellating of St. Mary's product, Taco King, and Tampa Bay
The only way we as a city are going to care about the local teams is if they win. Something only the Ports have done so far. You remember how much support they got? Yeah, it wasn't much. And they're the most popular local team. The ceiling for these teams isn't high, so hey, maybe we can spread the coverage out a little bit.
Thursday, February 12, 2009
Quick Links for Feb. 12th. Happy Birthday Lincoln! (And Darwin)
Damn, that rain came out of nowhere yesterday didn't it? One second it was just sprinkling and then the next it's hailing (yes, I saw hail yesterday). Fucking intense. Ok, I'm no good at idle small talk. Let's just get to the Quick Links.
He's gonna be California's new governor whether we like it or not!
Fresh off of inadvertently killing any chances of Prop 8 being defeated (Everytime I've talked to somebody about this meeting they've mentioned the "Like it or not" line in a negative fashion. Even though, you know, he was right), the mayor of Hippietown is coming to Stockton to promote his image in the largely and unfortunately conservative San Joaquin Valley.
We'd love to go to this but they're retardedly holding this event at the new University Center at UOP in a conference room that holds like 500 people tops. Considering the fact that UOP contains most of Stockton's liberals and that the event is open to all of Stockton, not just UOP, this event should be a crowded debacle. Especially since the Record forgot to note that this is an RVSP-only event.
So don't be surprised if there's a last second venue change to the Faye Spanos Concert Hall or something. Sure, it's not a green building (probably the reason it's being held at the DeRosa Center), but it's better than packing 500+ people in a room with folding chairs. So yeah, we suggest arriving around 5.
Ironically his breast implant procedure doesn't involved any titty touching.
We're not going to pretend that we know what it's like to be in this situation, but how the fuck do you go back to the same guy after he fingers your vag during a tummy tuck? Granted, we're nowhere near experts on the situation. Personally I've only been put under once and most of what I know about it stems from that one youtube video of that kid after the dentist, but I can imagine that if even I just thought somebody was messing with my shit while I was incapacitated I'd ask for a new doctor. But then again we can't really fault the woman for going back because, again, we really have no idea what it's like to be in this situation and don't mean to offend anybody with the above comments. It's just a shitty situation. And we really hope the victims get justice.
Oh, and that doctor is ballsy as hell to ask to be allowed to continue practicing medicine. Who the hell would go to him after these allegations?
Not that this is saying much, but I'd hit it
In other inappropriate touching news, a few more details have been released in the McNair student/teacher sex scandal. The mug shot is out. It was revealed she was an English teacher. No word on whether or not the student was in once of her classes. The fact that they intercepted her on her way to a late night rendezvous was pretty funny. Hopefully he had his homework done before he went out. Oh, and McNair students apparently echo our sentiments from yesterday since their quote about the teacher was that she was "Nice."
We have to ask though, a 24-year old high school teacher? How could anybody think that was a good idea? The age difference is just way too close. It shouldn't be possible for both teacher and student shouldn't be nursing hangovers. All my English teachers in HS were old and dudes. Yet McNair, being a fairly new school, has an assload of young teachers. Like younger than any of us (although not by much). Something like this was inevitable. Although it really does beg the question, how old is 16 really?
Quick Hits
Who's ready for "Reclaiming the Dry Bean Festival"?
I thought the Guerrero family creed was "lie, cheat, and steal" (or "Cheat to win" for you WCW fans). I don't remember anything about stabbing. Uncle Eddie's going to be pissed.
And Don Blount sees errors and explains the highly complicated corrections process!
He's gonna be California's new governor whether we like it or not!
Fresh off of inadvertently killing any chances of Prop 8 being defeated (Everytime I've talked to somebody about this meeting they've mentioned the "Like it or not" line in a negative fashion. Even though, you know, he was right), the mayor of Hippietown is coming to Stockton to promote his image in the largely and unfortunately conservative San Joaquin Valley.
We'd love to go to this but they're retardedly holding this event at the new University Center at UOP in a conference room that holds like 500 people tops. Considering the fact that UOP contains most of Stockton's liberals and that the event is open to all of Stockton, not just UOP, this event should be a crowded debacle. Especially since the Record forgot to note that this is an RVSP-only event.
So don't be surprised if there's a last second venue change to the Faye Spanos Concert Hall or something. Sure, it's not a green building (probably the reason it's being held at the DeRosa Center), but it's better than packing 500+ people in a room with folding chairs. So yeah, we suggest arriving around 5.
Ironically his breast implant procedure doesn't involved any titty touching.
We're not going to pretend that we know what it's like to be in this situation, but how the fuck do you go back to the same guy after he fingers your vag during a tummy tuck? Granted, we're nowhere near experts on the situation. Personally I've only been put under once and most of what I know about it stems from that one youtube video of that kid after the dentist, but I can imagine that if even I just thought somebody was messing with my shit while I was incapacitated I'd ask for a new doctor. But then again we can't really fault the woman for going back because, again, we really have no idea what it's like to be in this situation and don't mean to offend anybody with the above comments. It's just a shitty situation. And we really hope the victims get justice.
Oh, and that doctor is ballsy as hell to ask to be allowed to continue practicing medicine. Who the hell would go to him after these allegations?
Not that this is saying much, but I'd hit it
In other inappropriate touching news, a few more details have been released in the McNair student/teacher sex scandal. The mug shot is out. It was revealed she was an English teacher. No word on whether or not the student was in once of her classes. The fact that they intercepted her on her way to a late night rendezvous was pretty funny. Hopefully he had his homework done before he went out. Oh, and McNair students apparently echo our sentiments from yesterday since their quote about the teacher was that she was "Nice."
We have to ask though, a 24-year old high school teacher? How could anybody think that was a good idea? The age difference is just way too close. It shouldn't be possible for both teacher and student shouldn't be nursing hangovers. All my English teachers in HS were old and dudes. Yet McNair, being a fairly new school, has an assload of young teachers. Like younger than any of us (although not by much). Something like this was inevitable. Although it really does beg the question, how old is 16 really?
Quick Hits
Who's ready for "Reclaiming the Dry Bean Festival"?
I thought the Guerrero family creed was "lie, cheat, and steal" (or "Cheat to win" for you WCW fans). I don't remember anything about stabbing. Uncle Eddie's going to be pissed.
And Don Blount sees errors and explains the highly complicated corrections process!
Monday, February 9, 2009
Quick Links for Feb 9th
Don't worry, it's not just the misinformed ramblings of pissed off internet commenters today. We just hope that post distracts from the fact that jack shit happened over the weekend. Friday news dumps only work when other, bigger shit happens to overshadow it. And I'll be damned if nothing happened. Oh sure, the Record tweaked it's website a bit. Once we figure out all of what they did we'll tell you it sucks or something. By until then, let's try some Quick Links.
Downtown revitalization set to happen any day now
We could pile on here, so we will. Could somebody please tell us how much longer IFG's contract runs? We'd love to start a countdown clock. The eventual goal being competent booking by 2030! Ok, it's too easy to pile on. Look, the Arena's never going to be a straight up cash cow. The benefit of the Arena is that it gets people downtown whereas before the only way you were getting me downtown involved chains and horses, or a jury summons. It's about getting people downtown and spending money at other downtown businesses. So while it's fun to laugh at the money the Arena has lost, we have to remember that's it's all about how many people come to games. Oh, we're still fucked. Nevermind.
Man unsuccessfully tries to spend as much time away from wife as possible
(Note: We would have loved to have linked to this story, because it's pretty bad. But it's not on the Record's site, at all. Google site searches for both the headline and the lede bring up jack shit.)
There are multiple things wrong with this article. So the fact that it was written by Bob Highfill should come as no surprise. Let's see what we can spot a fairly easily one to pick on. Oh, I know! That convenient calendar on the back page. Highfill claims that "Stockton's Super Fan" Bill Robertson has 20 out of the 28 days of this month filled with events. The first day (the first fucking day!) reads "Alameda Antique Show 9am Super Bowl 3:30pm". Barring a last second cross-country flight to Tampa, how is this a live sporting event? The calendar is titled "Live sporting event schedule for Bill Robertson" after all. The Alameda Antique Show is not a sporting event. Hell, it's not even in fucking Stockton! Do we really need to know this guy's antiquing schedule? It's not like his Feb. 7th entry is any more impressive because he was at the De Anza Flea Market before going to watch women's basketball. Does that mean I get to count my trips to the Natomas Hooters before Kings games as a separate event because I like to stare at tits and drink beer? I haven't seen stats this padded since Barry Bonds.
Don Blount not only sees lines, he sees between them!
Oh hey, it's Monday! Which means the new "Shit Don Blount Saw" came out! In this one he sees an unemployment line! Or a job applicant line! Or...some sort of line, he never really specifies. He also put down Parade magazine long enough to see unemployment statistics. Have you seen these unemployment figures? OMG, I think something might be really wrong with the economy! People are applying for not one, but two jobs! Imagine that! That has to be something new! Luckily, this whole economy thing hasn't reached newspapers, right? Fuck.
Alright, see you guys tomorrow.
Downtown revitalization set to happen any day now
We could pile on here, so we will. Could somebody please tell us how much longer IFG's contract runs? We'd love to start a countdown clock. The eventual goal being competent booking by 2030! Ok, it's too easy to pile on. Look, the Arena's never going to be a straight up cash cow. The benefit of the Arena is that it gets people downtown whereas before the only way you were getting me downtown involved chains and horses, or a jury summons. It's about getting people downtown and spending money at other downtown businesses. So while it's fun to laugh at the money the Arena has lost, we have to remember that's it's all about how many people come to games. Oh, we're still fucked. Nevermind.
Man unsuccessfully tries to spend as much time away from wife as possible
(Note: We would have loved to have linked to this story, because it's pretty bad. But it's not on the Record's site, at all. Google site searches for both the headline and the lede bring up jack shit.)
There are multiple things wrong with this article. So the fact that it was written by Bob Highfill should come as no surprise. Let's see what we can spot a fairly easily one to pick on. Oh, I know! That convenient calendar on the back page. Highfill claims that "Stockton's Super Fan" Bill Robertson has 20 out of the 28 days of this month filled with events. The first day (the first fucking day!) reads "Alameda Antique Show 9am Super Bowl 3:30pm". Barring a last second cross-country flight to Tampa, how is this a live sporting event? The calendar is titled "Live sporting event schedule for Bill Robertson" after all. The Alameda Antique Show is not a sporting event. Hell, it's not even in fucking Stockton! Do we really need to know this guy's antiquing schedule? It's not like his Feb. 7th entry is any more impressive because he was at the De Anza Flea Market before going to watch women's basketball. Does that mean I get to count my trips to the Natomas Hooters before Kings games as a separate event because I like to stare at tits and drink beer? I haven't seen stats this padded since Barry Bonds.
Don Blount not only sees lines, he sees between them!
Oh hey, it's Monday! Which means the new "Shit Don Blount Saw" came out! In this one he sees an unemployment line! Or a job applicant line! Or...some sort of line, he never really specifies. He also put down Parade magazine long enough to see unemployment statistics. Have you seen these unemployment figures? OMG, I think something might be really wrong with the economy! People are applying for not one, but two jobs! Imagine that! That has to be something new! Luckily, this whole economy thing hasn't reached newspapers, right? Fuck.
Alright, see you guys tomorrow.
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