Quick Links for March 20th

Fuck, I'm sick as a dog. I'd call in sick but I had to get sick during one of the two days where calling in sick is most abused, so nobody would believe me anyway. No word yet on the KSK Nasty Fetish Tourney. The matchups will go up as soon as Punter sends them to us. The fact that just announcing the tourney is coming here may have resulted in links to us being taken down on more respectable sites brings me some sick kind of joy. I wonder if that's a fetish we can sneak into the FetishInsider.com tourney. No way in hell we'd get hoodwinked into paying for hosting that tournament like some places I know. Hey, speaking of, Quick Links!

Hey guys, this matters! Really! We're still playing! Pay attention!

For those who don't know, UOP paid a pretty penny ($28,500 a round actually) to host the CollegeInsider.com Tournament. Why? I'll never know. I didn't been know there was a tournament past the NIT, let alone two. Apparently I'm not the only one as the opening game only drew 1,876 fans and UOP was said to have lost up to $10,000 hosting the game. So AD Lynn King promptly signed them up to host the quarterfinals. Makes total sense.

Of course after posting that dismal attendance number UOP's going on the offensive and trying to position the tournament as meaningful when it's anything but. The CollegeInsider.com Tourney is just a giant waste of money. Sure, it gives seniors and extra couple of games to play, but who really cares? We're all in the midst of watching the highest quality college basketball, who would then want to go back to watching a team that couldn't even make the other 2 postseason tournaments. The quality of play is just too low. Plus, what's really the best case scenario? Let's say UOP runs the table and wins the whole shebang, where does that rank them nationally? There are 3 other tournaments considered higher in prestige than the first year CollegeInsider.com tourney. Assuming they all field 65 teams, UOP's tourney victory would rank them 195th or so (math's not my strong suit) in the nation. Is that really worth the roughly $127,000 UOP would have to pay to host all 4 rounds? Couldn't that money have gone towards something better? Hey, what's this....

It doesn't matter if you're good looking, it doesn't matter if you wear Dungarees, it doesn't matter if you're fun to be around. Sooner or later, you're going to get raped

You know, $127k seems like a decent amount of hush money. I bet they could have offered that money to this broad and avoid the bad press instead of paying to play in a tournament where your second round opponent harbors one of the spurned alleged rapists. We're not coming down one way or the other on the whole rape issue, we don't know the details, but one would thing UOP would have made sure that this story wouldn't pop up a year later. Especially during a time when most kids and their parents are deciding on colleges. And double-especially with their unfortunate second round matchup in their Mickey Mouse tournament. Words can't express how disappointed I am that Steffan Johnson is ineligible for this game. That's how you pack an arena, with an alleged rapist. Just ask Don King.

I wonder how Fitzy feels about tree rape's seeding in the fetish tourney

Apparently Fitzy's new goal is to include as little actual information in his columns as possible. First there was his community-owned team idea where one of his reasons (the top reason actually) for owning the team was "We'd be Gods". The meaning of which is still not entirely certain. And now he's doing retreads from his blog (which we would link to if the Record's search engine was anything resembling competent). Of course Fitzy's long crusade for trees seems like one giant retread because he rarely says anything new. Urban forest is dying, City Hall is blowing it if they don't address the issue, city will be ugly without trees, volunteer to help, blah blah fucking blah. Who needs new information? It's not like he writes for a newspaper or anything.

Special preview! Don Blount sees typewriters!

And if you thought a column about trees was exciting, wait til you read Don Blount's column about antiquing or something. What information will be revealed? Probably none, other than the fact that typewriters are old any nobody uses them anymore, which means college hipsters are going to start buying them all up and turning in typewritten term papers for irony's sake. And you know what that means, trend piece! That sound you hear is journalism dying a little bit.