The rare time an audit is actually a good thing

We've made our views on Delta's spending of bond dollars fairly clear over the past few months. Mostly because we all were attending Delta when Measure L passed. If you listened to anybody working for the college back then they'd tell you that Measure L was going to solve all of Delta's problems.

Obviously that hasn't been the case. And the State Controller's Office's audit of Delta's spending (actual audit can be found here. No, we don't know why the Record couldn't have just provided this link directly either) provides an awesome summary of their fuckups. Including many things that sounds vaguely familiar.

The key fuckup (technical term) has to be this part:

“This audit shows the (Delta College) Board of Trustees disregarded the priority projects reflected in Measure L and the college’s master plan and instead diverted bonds proceeds to build an Olympic-quality track and other athletic facilities."

That's right, instead of spending money on shit Delta actually needed, they spent $11.4 million on state of the art athletic facilities (and fancy electric signs!)....for a community college. Why the fuck does Delta need an Olympic-quality track? They didn't even need a Special Olympic-quality track. State of the art field? For what? Did they add fucking luxury boxes? A third tier of seats?

Even their excuse is bullshit:

"Old fields were uneven and full of potholes, Delta officials wrote in their response to the draft audit."

You know how you fix an old, uneven field full of potholes? You drive down March Lane to Home Depot and buy some sod and a shovel. Total cost? Maybe $100. The only way spending just $1 million makes sense is if Delta's field resembled Heinz Field. Wasn't there some sort of committee to oversee and stop this sort of ridiculous spending?

"Members of a citizen's oversight committee "worked diligently ... to protect the taxpayers," the college said. Auditors found members of this committee made just one site visit more than three years ago."

Wow. Our tax dollars were protected about a much a Ben Rothlisberger is from the blitz (Can you tell we watched the Steelers game yesterday?). And the Delta Trustees rushed through those gaping holes in our offensive line to sack our tax dollars on every fucking play. They duped us. And now they won't even let us discuss possible changes. Which brings us to our last point...

November's Rube(s) of the Month!

What does the Rube of the Month club have to do with Delta's ludicrious misspending of our bond dollars? We had to approve it! Which means that this month's Rube of the Month is anybody who voted "yes" on Measure L! Sorry, but you got duped by the entire Board of Trustees. And, as documented here over the past couple months, they're not even very smart!

Don't worry, being a rube's not that bad. It happens to the best of us. I once bought a cell phone that retailed for $150 for $50 from a kiosk in the front of the Super King. Being the dumbass I am I didn't turn on the phone before buying it. When I got home the screen was so fucked up it looked like I was looking at a negative of the screen. Of course there were no refunds. I promised myself right then and there to never trust an Asian again. And that's what you rubes will probably do. Never trust any bond measure ever again. Sad thing is, the auditors know that too.

"I am concerned the example set by Delta College could endanger voter-approved bond funding for future public works projects."

You fooled us once Detla, shame on fuck you. We kinda doubt you're going to get a chance to fool us twice.