We've read this story a couple of times and we're still not 100% what happened. The security guard got arrested for trying to keep the pumpkin patch secure, you know, his job. And then all of the sudden the kid who gets shot is an alleged rapist? Where the fuck did that come from? Was he raping pumpkins? The Great Pumpkin is not going to be pleased.
Speaking of shit we touched on yesterday, Bogey's is back in the news for (surprise!) another senseless act of violence. We've blamed lots of things on alcohol, the latest being that $200 lap dance I bought last Friday (You ever get an hour long lap dance? Totally worth it), but stabbing a guy with his own knife is a bit extreme. Alcohol is not an excuse, unless she was really really fat.
So it turns out that the bus driver of that casino bus crash wasn't drunk or high at all, just a really bad driver. Law enforcement has a day to find probable cause to continue holding him. That's right, we live in a world where a guy gets arrested for shooting a pumpkin rapist, but this guy's probably going to walk even though his shitty driving may have killed some people. (They're still trying to figure out the actual cause of the accident. Our money's on too many fat guys on one side of the bus during a sharp turn)
We're not even going to feign surprise about this. Leave the fruit basket though, it's still fresh enough for the next guy. Plus we can't afford to buy the new guy another, fucking budget cuts. By the way, offering to give up vacation days isn't that good of a counter offer because the city would still have to fucking pay you. Not that this is about money or anything...