So without further blabbering, here's the...
Top 5 comics the Record needs to ditch
1. "Watch Your Head"
We started reading this comic when the Record first slapped it on there, and it has yet to be funny. Is this like "For Better or For Worse" or "Family Circus" where there is no joke, just observations on life? Was the "Boondocks" that scarring of an experience for the Record that they had to punish it's old spot with this bullshit?
Technically this comic is on the 3-Minute Record, but that makes it even worse because some days we just skip the comics, but never the 3-Minute Record. (We're suckers for the Quote of the Day) Regardless of placement, it's still painfully unfunny. We get the whole attempt at dry humor thing. But, and take it from us, dry humor is hard to do in a written format. F-Minus has the added bonus of visual aid and it's still unfunny. Can't that space be better used for more celebrity news?
3. "Family Circus"
I would gladly hand a dollar to anybody who can show me a funny Family Circus. It's not possible. Dysfunctional Family Circus does not count. Sure, these were funny when you were like 4, but as an adult do you really feel responsible letting your child read that shit? They'll go try blaming shit they did on gay ghosts. Plus kids have to learn they don't leave a dotted line when they go running around the neighborhood by themselves.
Sorry, just not funny. But then again, we doubt we're the target audience. Although what comic's target audience is a bunch of dudes in their mid-twenties. Ok, besides "Pearls Before Swine" (Another glaring Sunday omission).
5. "Dennis the Menace"
A painful but needed choice. We were fans of this one as kids, but that was back in a time where there was no internet. Hell, that was before any of our families even owned a computer. Long story short, the 80s were a crazy time. Plus in real life Mr. Wilson would have gotten a vicious pitbull by now to keep that little fuckshovel out of his yard.
Coming sometime later, the Top 5 comics that should replace the last 5.